The Fife and Drum

I read an article in the New York Times recently in which a neurosurgeon offered an explanation of what it might be like to have that extra 23rd chromosome.  From his research, he was able to gather that what happens to our kids because of this extra chromosome is that an onslaught of stimuli often crowds the brain and causes confusion.  Perhaps that's why our kids struggle when there are too many outside variables, when it's loud and confusing, when they freeze or withdraw.  There's just too much coming at them for them to handle.  It makes sense.  I've seen Jared when too much of the world comes at him at once.  Nothing good ever comes of that. So recently, when we toured Williamsburg, Virginia, particularily the military camp, I saw what happens when clear, simple directions are given to Jared. He thrived as he play-acted a pre-revolutionary soldier.  When Jared fell in and received the barked orders from the Sargeant, he knew exactly what to do! The clarity and precision of the orders enabled Jared to receive and act right along with the other volunteers on the field. His "Yes Sargeant!" was the loudest, the most passionate. He really felt a part of something! He followed the directions to the very best of his ability. Frankly, the armed forces would probably embrace the dedication exhibited by Jared in just a few minutes of this revolutionary role play.  After Jar was done, he came over to me and said he wanted to be in the army.  Oh, to have seen that light in his eyes! His little brother looked on, and then later approached me asking if Jared will really be going in the Army.  I told my 7 year old that while it was a good dream, it really can't work because Jared has special needs and the army doesn't take people with Down Syndrome.  Imagine my sadness, when, not meaning to be hurtful, my 7 year old ran up to Jared to matter of factly tell him that he can't be in the Army.  I quickly grabbed Bray's arm and whispered not to tell Jared that right now. It would be too cruel.  As a matter of fact, I skirted the issue myself, telling Jared that the army is not all it's cracked up to be. That it is a hard life and that we would miss him too much.  I couldn't find it in myself to squelch that dream at that moment. Rather, I let Jared march around the battlefield with the long stick that would be his musket in a world where he knew exactly what needed to be done in order to keep his loved ones safe.